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In the shadows of the Florida night, a disturbing presence – unnoticed by most slithered down U.S. Route 41 – Tamiami Trail.
This was no ordinary vehicle; it was a monstrous, steel Goliath. This unholy contraption carved asphalt arteries with an insatiable hunger, eager to bring terror to an unsuspecting beach town.
The Blood moon-lit sky offered no refuge as the monster arrived, its malevolent “eyes” casting an eerie glare.
It rumbled and groaned, emitting guttural sounds that echoed through the empty grocery parking lot—a symphony of doom.
Upon its colossal back, this monster carried a legion of SUVs, sports cars, and Cadillacs. These posh cars huddled together like a crop of possessed souls… tainted, cursed, infused with the darkest intentions.
In my peripheral vision, their metal skeletons appeared to warp and twist, forming grotesque faces. They contorted into vile laughs. Their headlights, like wicked eyes, followed me as I carried a gallon of 2% milk across the Publix parking lot.
Bonita Springs, my small town, still lay in blissful ignorance over the Labor Day weekend, its humble streets and friendly locals ignoring the impending invasion.
But that gigantic car carrier trailer, a harbinger of chaos, had arrived. Its humming engine whispered the pending surge of seasonal vacationers and snowbirds, a sound that would chill the spines of those who dared to listen.
Soon, the town's peaceful streets will be overrun by a relentless traffic surge, a never-ending vortex of honking horns, screeching brakes, and enraged drivers.
The monster's engine roared with a final sound that resembled a demonic laugh.
The invasion is imminent. The traffic apocalypse awaits.
Welcome to “Season” in the Florida Republic.
September Begins
Stay positive,
Garrett Baldwin
Secretary of Finance
You can download a copy of this postcard by clicking here.
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